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2005-06-28 - 11:23 a.m.

Vodka-tonics? What vodka-tonics?

As promised, I have some stories of drunken weddingness today.

First off, a disclaimer. Safe drinking, no driving, don't be an idiot, etc. Stories of my tipsy escapades do not mean I drink all day every day, and so on.

Our friends who were getting married had such a beautiful wedding. It was so thrilling to see them together, when they had been waiting for this day for so darn long. They had gone through far too much long-distance time in their relationship.

I went to an extremely fun bachelorette party on Thursday that involved penis confetti. And really, what is NOT better when it involves penis confetti? (ok. Probably the workplace. But it's pretty cool anywhere else.) It was at Howl at the Moon, a piano bar in River North that is bachelorette-party-central. The dueling pianos are fun (though FAR too much Jimmy Buffet is played. Of course, in my world One Jimmy Buffet is Too Many Jimmy Buffets.)

I discussed my crazy Friday in the last entry, so on we go to Saturday. After we got home from the suburbs, we didn't have a particularly large amount of time to get ready. We were hurrying a bit, though we did make it to the church (just minutes) before the wedding started. We were wandering around trying to find a place to park that wasn't in front of one of these signs:

God says...

The ceremony was beautiful (though my husband elbowed me pretty hard during the "for richer or poorer" part. I asked him why, and he said, "Well, it'd be pretty hard for us to be much poorer, right?" True.), and then we headed outside into the nearly 100 degree heat. (No, really. You can see on the sign in the background of that picture!) (oh, and WHY?!?)

My husband and I went home to let the dog out, and he dropped me off at the reception site to help decorate (am such a nice person! And so modest!) while he went to our friends' hotel room to drink some beer.

Once the reception site was decorated, people were coming in and signing the guest book, heading to the bar, and just generally starting the party. Now, though I'm very much a beer person, my drink of choice at weddings are vodka-tonics. If I'm drinking for free, I'm not going to get crappy beer like Bud and MGD. If anyone had kegs of microbrew on tap, I'd be all over it. But no such luck at most weddings. So, had my husband get me my lovely vodka-tonic from the bar. Then, when it was nearly gone, I accompanied a friend up to the bar. And of course needed to get another one since otherwise I would have just been turning right back around in a couple of minutes to get more. Then, when it was halfway gone, they made like to have us sit at our tables. So I figured I might as well get another one before the bar closed for dinner.

Then, sitting at the table with my husband's college advisor and family (as well as our adorable ex-roommates from when we lived in Colorado), we had a thrilling and enjoyable dinner conversation. I did, however, have to run to the potty before the main course. (Darn vodka and its diuretic nature...)

The table right next to us was even more meteorologist-laden than our own. Our friends visiting from Texas, a few more friends from college who are working as TV meteorologists in various markets around the Midwest, this guy*, and another guy who (I think?) was his producer.

Sidebar: I'm NOT a touchy person. I enjoy hugging and cheek kissing people who are close friends or family members, but generally I'd be far happier in a world without handshakes. Perhaps it's the Norwegian stand-offishness in me, or the Lutheran personal-space thing, or a frightening combination of the two, but I'm probably the least huggy person you're likely to meet. When drinking (with old friends. Not with just anyone), however, I have a tendency to 1.) grab my friends' behinds, 2.) play boob tag (it goes, "Boob tag! You're it! No tagbacks!"), 3.) cheek kiss everyone, and 4.) lip kiss (no, not tongue kiss. It's not a gutter-mind type of situation) my girl friends.

Coming back from the bathroom, I decided to give my friends at the table some cheek kisses. I kissed about three people at the table, went to head back to my table, and heard some complaining from the same guy along the lines of, "So the rest of us don't get kisses? That's not very friendly!" Being the people-pleaser I am, I wouldn't want to make anyone feel bad. So I just went around the table and each person got a cheek kiss. See? I'm not a ho. I just like to make people happy.

There is a picture. Our TX friends have it (HEY! Send it over!), so at some point I'll be able to prove my story to the skeptical contingent.

The rest of the evening went beautifully, and he mentioned how much he loved the kiss before he left as well. So, you know, I make people happy! And am not simply a famous-people-whore. I simply am very agreeable and amenable to suggestions with many drinks inside me. Perhaps it is better than being belligerent. I don't know.

I do know that after weddings I end up missing my friends in other parts of the country even more than I had before. I realize that I ended up in a place I love with family and many friends, but that not everyone else lucked out like that. Also, that it's just wretchedly unfair that some people are happy where they are and others aren't. And isn't there some sort of requisition system where I can put in an order for certain people to get jobs near me? I don't want to go through major life changes without my closest friends being near me, and I hate seeing their lives change without being able to be there for them. It's one of those Life Is Unfair things that just makes me bang my head on walls. I know there's plenty worse in this world that doesn't involve me, thankfully. But that doesn't mean I don't want everyone to have perfect lives anyway.

*Both the bride and groom had interned at WGN in college, so he was invited and was happy to come to the wedding. He is a big supporter of the meteorology program our alma mater, and is just an all-around nice guy as well.

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