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2005-04-28 - 9:38 a.m.

Creepy Port-o-Let Guy

Just so you all know... I am a Creepy Guy magnet. For this reason, I try my darndest to surround myself with large men. (It's easier if you're a sports fan, by the way) I will settle for many women if the large men are nowhere to be found.

Yesterday, I was walking to my bus stop. It's only a half block from my house, and I wait there every morning at the same time (give or take 5 minutes). That means that I see the same people there day after day. I talk to some of them, I exchange smiles with others, and some don't really acknowledge my existence. Anyway, I was walking to the bus stop on Halsted where the ENTIRE STREET is torn up because they're making Bridgeport pretty. So rich people will move in and I'll have to move to afford a house. And in the construction zone about 10 feet from my bus stop, there is a porta-potty. Or Port-o-Let as the trademark may be. Just as I was about to get to the bus stop, a creepy looking middle aged white guy with long, dreadlocked hair and raggedy clothes got out of the porta-potty. I thought to myself, "Hey, he doesn't look like a construction worker. He looks creepy! I hope he doesn't talk to me."

Guess what happened next. No, guess. YES! He struck up a whole conversation based on what bus route this was. Dude, see where the street sign says "Halsted"? Yeah, that's what bus route it is. And since I'm a PANSY and can't pointedly ignore people, I was sort of murmuring "Uh huh," and so on while I read my book.* He was starting to get far more creepy by asking me where I was going, what lines I take to get there, etc. I was getting a little nervous about this guy because for some reason no one else was at my bus stop yet.

Then one of the regular bus stop people walked up. It was a guy (probably early 20s) who was one of those doesn't-usually-acknowledge-my-existence types. He also wears both Cubs gear and Sox gear, so I've been a little unsure about him in the past. He sized up the situation, smiled at me, and started talking to me about my book. The creepy guy started to lose interest once I wasn't alone (EVEN MORE CREEPY!), and just stood there like he was waiting for the bus. Once we got on the bus, the creepy guy didn't board and just started walking down the street.

I love you, random bus stop guy. You're my knight in Cubs-jacketed/Sox-hatted armor.

*"The Pitch That Killed" by Mike Sowell. It's pretty interesting and is about this guy who got killed by a pitch that hit him in the head in 1920. I think I need to tone down the baseball obsession, but come on! It's April! And there was no hockey this winter to take away the sting of those many baseball-less months.

Tingles up my spine

Sometimes I'm just in a grouchy mood. Yesterday, it was because the Cubs kept me up late while pissing me off at the same time. I spent most of the day in a bad mood before I left work and realized that my Dell DJ contained the answer to my problem.

I have three main songs that I can count on to profoundly affect my mood.

If I'm in a bad mood. An angry, not sad mood. I'll get a complete turnaround by listening to one minute and thirty seconds of Verdi's Requiem, Second Movement (Dies Irae). I nearly blew out my headphones on the el today listening to this. Before you laugh dismissively about classical music blowing out headphones, connect to some good speakers (this might take some effort. It's worth it), turn your bass up to max, turn the volume up without blowing out the speakers, and listen to a sample. You've probably heard it on car commercials, but screw that. You need some good damn speakers to understand. There is classical music (and I'm using that term in the broadest sense here -- for all you music nerds out there) that I think is better. There is music I like more. But NOTHING can get me out of a bad mood like this can.

If I'm in a stressed mood and the world just seems a little to difficult or serious for me, I need to listen to Ryan Adams "To Be Young (is to be sad, is to be high)" -- and to hear this one you'll want to click here and scroll down to the Downloads section. Supposedly Ryan Adams is a bit crazy (he once walked off stage and refused to play a concert because someone called him "Bryan Adams" -- I really can't say I blame him though!), but this is just a brilliant, pick-me-up of a song.

If I'm in a sad, crying, upset mood, I'll listen to Otis Redding's "I've Been Loving You Too Long (To Stop Now)" and immediately get the chills. And feel better. Especially when I'm also lonely. I can't find a sample that showcases the sections of the song that give me chills, so get thee to a music store and find an Otis Redding compilation disc! Or download it on iTunes or whatever. It's well worth any money you end up spending on it. He does this slide thing that makes me shiver. Then I stare around at people on the bus or el with me and look at them like, "How the hell are you people just sitting here! Listen to this music!" Then I remember that they can't hear it. And feel sorry for them. Like the Verdi piece, there are other Otis Redding songs I like better (most notably the first dance song at our wedding "That's How Strong My Love Is"), but this one has a weird power over me.

Psycho Weekend

I love all of my friends. And my husband's friends. And my coworkers. Really, I love everyone. But for HEAVEN'S SAKE! Why must every single possible party/event be scheduled for this weekend? I'm fine with full weekends with lots of drinking. Actually, I'm more than fine with the drinking and the hanging out with fun people and so on.

Here's the schedule though:

Friday: husband's friend's birthday party (and something else, I think! I can't remember what!)

Saturday:
2pm - driving to the alma mater in Indiana to see the dedication of our old department's new building
4pm - coworker's party for his daughter
8pm - husband's friend from high school's party

Sunday:
I haven't thought that far ahead yet. There very well may be something huge I'm forgetting. Let me know if it's with you, okay?


A marital exchange:

Me: I have a headache.

Husband: I have some aspirin if you want it.

Me (primly): I've been reading too much stuff about health and have decided that I would be healthier if I only take things that are safe if you're pregnant. That way, I know I'm being the healthiest possible me. Because, I mean, do I want to be taking things into my body that really aren't safe?

Husband: And what about all that beer you drank yesterday?

Me (out loud): Umm... Oh yeah. Okay, give me the aspirin.

Me (in my head): Sorry, Pretend Baby! Enjoy the aspirin and beer. I'll be nice to you when you're real.

Reason #423 that my husband rocks:

I was on the el coming home yesterday when the Cubs won -- with Corey Patterson (my favorite player!) hitting the walk-off home run to win the game.

When I walked in the door, my husband was on the phone and was gesturing toward the TV. He pressed play and I discovered that he had paused the TiVo and rewound it to the home run so I would get to see it.

Confidential to Corey Patterson:
I love you. If you hook my husband up with enough Cubs tickets/gear, I'm sure we can work something out. XOXOX

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